(no subject)

[geekchick]

Via wispfox, I find a pointer to a perfect explanation of why I avoid childfree like the plague. (Yes, I've ranted about this before, so I won't do it again right this minute.)

Comments

[bafleyanne.livejournal.com]

I totally agree. I *have* a child, but I find myself in agreement with the annoyances a lot of childfree people have--stupid people who don't discipline/take proper care of/control in public/etc. their kids, children who abuse animals, loud kids in restaurants and movie theatres, etc--and I try my best to keep *my* child from being an annoyance. But the hate is just not required, IMHO. You made a choice to not breed, own your choice, move on with your life. Don't expect anyone else to jump up and down and cheer or change *their* life to accomodate you.

You=collective, btw. :)

[geekchick]

Indeed. I strongly dislike kids running wild in public, but I place the blame for that on parents not teaching their kids how to behave and it's not IMO a valid reason to hate children. I must also confess that loudly-crying babies raise my blood pressure, but if I'm in a public space, it's my responsibility to remove myself if it bothers me so much. (I'm talking places like malls or the local diner, not 5-star restaurants obviously not designed for kids.) I'm sure, as someone said, all of the vitriol-spewers sprang fully-formed from their mother's womb and were oh so very different from the kids they now despise.

[hammercock.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the capital-C Childfree people are pretty fucked up. I kind of pity them, actually. How terrible it must be to go around so filled with that kind of rage and intolerance that it takes over your life like that. And to think that they'll have no one to take care of them in their old age, either...but then, who'd want to? They'll probably be even more unpleasant when they're old. Tsk. :-}

[geekchick]

the capital-C Childfree people

Definitely an important distinction. =) Many of my friends and acquaintances are childfree, as I am, but so far as I know, my close friends are not of the ranting, vitriol-spewing, "crotch-dropping"-using variety. It's just that those folks tend to drown out the calmer voices in a forum.

I have to admit that I don't understand the concept of hating kids simply because they happen to be kids. Not want any? Oh, definitely. Not want to spend time around them? Sure, I would usually prefer to hang out and talk with adults myself. But *hate* them?

[trinker.livejournal.com]

Thanks for pointing that out.

[ame-chan.livejournal.com]

*applauds*

I LOVE that journal.

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

Love the icon, BTW. ;-)

We have no children, so Toni and I sometimes get lumped in with the vitriol-spewing crowd of the type that frequent childfree. I like children, TYVM. Yes, I get annoyed when they are uncontrolled and/or exhibit bad behavior in public, but I point the finger at the parent(s). Yes, I'm uncomfortable relating to certain children, but it's just a lack of experience, and I classify it along with my discomfort around some kinds of adults, not because they're children.

[patgreene.livejournal.com]

I read the post and loved it. I started reading the comments, and had to stop. One of the people making pious "yes, I agree with you totally, those people are awful" noises was someone I dropped from my friends list last year after she referred to children as "personal parasites," among other things. I decided that discretion was the better part of valor, and stopped reading so that I could resist the urge to point this out.

[geekchick]

I know the one you mean, and was vaguely amused by that myself. ;)

[anotheranon.livejournal.com]

I agree with much of this, but might I present an alternative point of view?

I agree that most of what I see on childfree, alt.childfree and other CF discussion boards is extremely hostile and extreme. However, I'm not entirely sure that the sentiments aren't more than just blowing off steam. Let me explain:

I friended childfree a couple of years ago when I was sharing an office with an extremely baby-obsessed co worker. I didn't post much, but it was cathartic to read after several months of rabid co-worker talking (in detail, whether you wanted her to or not) about wanting a baby, getting pregnant, giving birth, gooey diapers, etc. What was most annoying was that despite my calm statement (and restatement.. and restatement..) that I didn't want children, she kept insisting that I'd change my mind. I really needed the rants after a 40 hour work week of this :P

Now I realize that my real issue was not childfree person vs. parent, but quiet keep-to-myself person vs. oversharing, trying to tell me what I should want in life person.

Now 4 years later I no longer work with this person and don't need the catharsis. Also, at 31, I think people are finally starting to believe me when I say I don't want kids :)

Just keep in mind that not all of the childfree bile may be heartfelt - it just may be they've been hounded just that one time too many.