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QOTD: Good jeans
Good jeans require exhaustive evaluation, diagnosis, and a prescription. If you accept jeans dispensed by any random idiot off the street, you may experience muffintop, cameltoe, saddlebags, thass (a malignant condition caused by rear-pocket placement that makes one's ass appear to start at mid thigh), fugliness, public humiliation, and death. You should not use jeans dispensed by any random idiot off the street if you have a functioning brain and/or a shred of self-awareness.
If you or a loved one has been the victim of jeans dispensed by any random idiot off the street, you may be entitled to compensation. Call 1-800-SUEHISASS to see if you qualify for participation in a class action lawsuit.
- Ren, in comments at Smart Bitches, Trashy Books